How to Use The Books and the Workbook to Do the Work !

This page is in response to many questions about how to use the books and workbook – in what order etc.

Buy Getting Past Your Breakup and Getting Back Out There wherever books are sold—on-line or brick and mortar and PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW THEM!!!

You don’t HAVE to HAVE the workbook, but you should have both books. If you want to get  the workbook, Getting Past Your Past go  HERE  And you can review the workbook HERE

Based on working with clients over 20 years and reader feedback as well as how they were written, this is the best way to do the books and workbook:

The program began in the 1990s as Getting Past Your Past, a general self-improvement seminar/workshop/course. It became Getting Past Your Breakup after most of the attendees were coming off a breakup/going through a divorce and asking for the BOOK (which did not exist).

Between 1995 and 2007, the courses/seminars/workshops had booklets/worksheets. Almost all of the worksheets from the courses are included in the workbook (it is over 300 pages).

The blog Getting Past Your Past started in 2007 and changed to Getting Past Your Breakup after the book was published in 2009.

Getting Past Your Breakup is THE most successful program for getting past your breakup and healing your heart and going on to healthier relationships. For some reviews of the book and to see its placement on Best Breakup Books go HERE

DO NOT SKIP portions of the program. That won’t work. Do it as it’s supposed to be done. It works!!!

There are 2 books, a workbook and many articles and YouTube videos. The YouTube channel is http://www.YouTube.com/user/gettingpastyourpast

The list of videos and a description is available below.  The FIRST video you should watch is When The Person You Love Doesn’t Love You.

 This is how to do the program to GET PAST YOUR BREAKUP:

1. Start with Getting Past Your Breakup (GPYB) book and make sure you have NC, journaling, affirmations, and self-care down.  This does not mean just reading them but that journaling and affirmations and self-care is full of your DAILY ROUTINE. You MUST MUST MUST build a foundation under you BEFORE you do the inventories. This part (#1) can take MONTHS!  Watch the NC videos below.

You should have read through the Grief chapter and understand the importance of balancing grief with self care: RE-READ CHAPTER ONE: THE ROADMAP TO HEALING in the beginning about balancing letting the bad out and the good in.

If you have kids, read Chapter 5 about the children during the breakup.

I also strongly suggest watching the YouTube videos especially for the affirmations. Many of the affirmation videos used to be private for only clients or boot camper, there are still private ones but I’ve made a lot of them public so please watch them. They are VERY important and go through the workbook chapters. If you don’t have these basics down, don’t go any further.

The Affirmations are VERY important. Most readers report that they used the books (there is an emphasis on affirmations in both books) but the workbook and the videos were most helpful.  Many of the Affirmation videos used to be private for my clients only but are now public.  Take advantage of it.   The workbook also goes into Even Though statements which the books do not and emphasizes the importance of Gratitude Lists.

2. The workbook (Getting Past Your Past) goes into depth about all these topics. Many people who have done the program have reported that the workbook was VERY important in helping them understand and work through the foundation topics (NC, affirmations, self-care, grief).

3. If you have boundary issues (and just about everyone does), both books and the workbook have in-depth instructions and exercises. There are also videos on boundaries.

4. When you have a solid foundation of NC, affirmations, journaling and self-care and are not falling apart in grief, you can start the Relationship Inventory. This is usually after 5-6 weeks. If you are not succeeding at NC, DO NOT do the Relationship Inventory until you are.

5. At this point, it’s time to open Getting Back Out There (GBOT)..DO NOT FREAK OUT…this is the order I recommend to everyone. It does not mean you’re ready to date or anywhere NEAR ready to date. As I’ve said a million times, GBOT is NOT a book for when you’re READY to date. It’s a book to GET you ready for a healthy relationship LONG before you are ready to date and that starts when you’re still in the middle of GPYB. The two books and the workbook work together. They are guidebooks and should be used as such. They should be opened every day while you’re going through this process. This is a 20 year old program that is proven successful by thousands of people.

TRUST THE PROCESS. It works. So now  OPEN Getting Back Out There. (GBOT)

6. After your Relationship Inventory (meaning the letter and if you have the workbook, doing the Letting Go rituals if you elect to do that)….pull out GBOT.

7. DO NOT READ THE FIRST 3 CHAPTERS in GBOT. Instead, go to Chapter 4 in GBOT: The Standards and Compatibility List. After some of the thoughts and issues that came up in the Relationship Inventory START THIS. Out of all the things you’re going to work on between the 2 books and the workbook, this is one of the MOST important and one you will hold near and dear long after you’ve forgotten your ex’s name.

8. If you have children, there is another children chapter in GBOT as to how to deal with kids, your ex etc..

9. I would also suggest reading chapters 8,9, 10 and Epilogue in GBOT. These chapters are about what kind of relationship/partner do you want. LONG BEFORE you are ready to date, you MUST have an idea of what kind of relationship you want and what kind of partner you want. OTHERWISE you will just fail again. You use these chapters to START an idea of what you want and to COMMIT to it…that when you are finally ready to date you will be able to figure out EARLY if someone is or isn’t it.

These chapters in Getting Back Out There, talk about the most important lessons of Accept It, Change It and Leave as well as communication issues and habits and lifestyles.  This is about learning what a healthy relationship looks like and that it is ACHIEVABLE.  

It’s not about trying to find someone you think is cute and funny and hoping your lifestyles and points of view mesh, but of figuring out what you NEED to have in your life to support your life and what you’re willing and able to do for someone else in their life without giving up who and what you are. These chapters in GBOT talk about these things and you absolutely need to be thinking about these things LONG before you are ready to date.

Even though it’s called “The Early Relationship” and the “Couples Inventory” these chapters in GBOT give you ideas about what kind of relationship you want to have and what kind of partner you want to have. It’s about starting to FORMULATE what you want in a partner and in a relationship. It’s about what is healthy and what is not.  Take the time to really think about this and figure out what kind of partner will complement you and be the right type of person for you.

You MUST take this time between relationships to know what you want so that when you DO start to date, you will know immediately when to walk away. If you don’t take this time to figure all this out and COMMIT to yourself to walking away when it’s NOT RIGHT, you’re going to fail again and again and again.

10. Keep the GBOT stuff (Chapter 4, 8, 9, 10) as part of what you visit every week. KEEP FORMULATING what you want in a partner. Keep asking yourself these questions and getting this stuff DOWN and committing to this and not settling for less NO MATTER WHAT.

You have to get right about all that as you work through the rest of your breakup issues. There is A LOT of food for thought in GBOT long before you are ready to date. Read it all (save the first 3 chapters and chapters 5 and 6 for when you actually ARE ready to date)
11. Next, go to the Life Inventory/Mother Inventory/Father Inventory in GPYB….with the idea of what you want – it’s time to think about what you’ve had as far as relationships go and the influence of early caregivers (or absence caregivers).

At this time, if you are working with books like Codependent No More or Women Who Love Too Much or whatever, it’s time to make a full program of your own and make it all work together.  For a list of GPYB Recommended Books and Authors go HERE

11. The workbook includes Goals and Defense Mechanisms chapters that are not in either book. The GOALS is part of self-care and the parts of the books and workbook that talk about building a new life. The DEFENSE MECHANISMS can be done when you’re looking at your patterns and issues that YOU need to look at in YOU as in why do you behave the way you do and/or attracted to who you are attracted to.

The workbook also has aromatherapy and letting go rituals for those who are into ceremonies and rituals.

If you get something from the books, please review on Amazon and other places like Good Reads (or Barnes & Noble, Goodreads etc) THANK YOU!!!

In addition to the books and the workbook, please check out the YouTubeVideosBy Susan J. Elliott, J.D., M.Ed.

NC The Way To Wellness – Go No Contact Today

This is the webinar I did (without the discussion that followed)…this is jthe presentation slide show but it is CHOCK FULL OF INFORMATION as to WHY No Contact and Take Care of You and the excuses that people give for breaking NC. NN Webinar – NO CONTACT is the SECRET to wellness.  GO NC TODAY!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=clyOMywrfog

GPYB: Moving On After Infidelity and Broken Trust

This was a question on the blog about affirmations and becoming honest again after being unfaithful and being with a deceptive person. How do you move on when you feel shame and guilt? How do you trust people if you yourself have lied?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9IL78ncR3yM&t=14s

GPYB: Your Right To Set Boundaries & How To Do That 

Another boundary lesson on setting boundaries with children and boundary crashers (Part 1 is about 9 minutes long) and, part 2, how to affirm your right to have boundaries.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvGMhcIx9D8

or https://youtu.be/NvGMhcIx9D8

(you don’t need to put both links in but you can use whichever one is easier for you….the first is in the browser and the second is under the SHARE button.)

Getting Past Your Breakup Introduction


Introduction to the Getting Past Your Breakup book. First in a series
of videos to accompany the book.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5Gp-nKMVnA

Getting Past Your Breakup No Contact Part I


This video is part 1 of the “Rules of Disengagement” of the Getting
Past Your Breakup Book. No-Contact is very important in the healing process of getting past a breakup.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4uKGp_qvPE

Getting Past Your Breakup Self-Care


Taking care of yourself during a breakup.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1mV1FLvLLHk

Getting Past Your Breakup Parenting Part I


First in a series of how to be a healthy parent after a breakup from
Getting Past Your Breakup.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vMnZex297o

Getting Past Your Breakup Grief


Grief is the healing feeling and so important to your moving on process.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BXf6f1lh93I

Getting Past Your Breakup NC Part 2 No FWB


Going NC means no physical relationship with the ex. Breakup sex is a bad idea. Don’t do it!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUTgKnr_RTw

Dating After The Big Breakup


Dating After The Breakup. The first video in a long time and I apologize to my readers for it being so long though it sounds like I’m saying I apologize for making this one. Actually it does say I apologize for it, but that isn’t what I meant unless if you don’t like it, then feel free to take that as an apology. 😉

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5BkuxkyRu2I

Tell your truth


No matter what anyone says, your truth is your truth. The last part got cut off but the last sentence is just “Talk about it and heal.” People who try to keep you from telling your truth are people who don’t want to deal with it, but they don’t have to. You do. If it’s harmed you in any way, it’s your truth — tell it and don’t be afraid that someone will call you a liar.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y9KKthlaVvg

Getting Past Your Past: The Workbook


1/17: Version 2.0 is NOW OUT. I have gone through the workbook and edited everything and also added 3 chapters. The workbook is available FOR INSTANT DOWNLOAD from your own SECURE page. https://gettingpastyourbreakup.com/gettingpastyourpast/gpyp-workbook-order-here/

This is the original description that goes with the video above: The new workbook that will help you do the work in the GPYB book as well as so much included from the GPYP seminar series and new material.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKAGnWNW5nc

Physical Transformation through Emotional and Mental Stamina


Grief can be debilitating but if you add medical issues to it, it can feel like it’s wearing you down. But you can work through it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9-u7neHu1is

Rebuilding

The story behind the SSJ video on this channel and going out, having fun and rebuilding your life when it’s the last thing you want to do.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0NqIv3H73A

 

Stop Being An Idiot


Stop throwing money at people who can’t take care of their own responsibilities. You’ll be much, much happier.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Vl6_AhxL90

Sometimes It Just Is What It Is


This is the “sometimes they’re not jerks” version of “When someone tells us who they are, believe them.” This is the non-psychopath version. When we think differently than someone, it’s not always that they’re jerks. It’s sometimes that they are simply not where we are and they can’t be. But the answer is still the same: you have to take care of you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8UXpnGj7eU

Getting Through The Holidays After A Breakup


It’s very hard for many after a breakup when the holidays come around.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_ZmlNdDoIE

When Someone Shows You Who They Are, Believe Them


This is the “they just might be jerks” video. Sometimes I’m hard on these people and sometimes not so hard. This is somewhere in the middle. But as always, it’s about taking care of you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-y7GLwk5mY8

When The Person You Love Doesn’t Love You: Part One


Time to reject the rejecter. It’s that simple. Not easy, but simple. Here’s how.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tg1BaONi2tw

When The Person You Love Doesn’t Love You PART TWO

Reject the Rejecter PART TWO

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6WnwJI6OZw

Taking Your Anger Out On The “Other” Woman/Man


Don’t take your anger out on someone who owed you zero loyalty.

Another in the “Don’t Be An Idiot” series of GPYB PSAs. 🙂

BTW, a friend said my shirt looks like it’s inside out. No, it’s a henley that is ribbed. 🙂

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ovhAnrxgBr4

GPYB’s Relationship Court: ENGAGEMENT RINGS!


Some legal information where the legal and the emotional intersect. This episode is ENGAGEMENT RINGS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=05hzgRiijyw

On Fairness, Gratitude, Love, Loss & Holidays


Life isn’t fair, but keeping perspective helps a great deal.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iaa0y13yynQ

 

GPYB’s Relationship Court: Restraining Orders


If you are not entitled to a restraining order, check yourself at the door. If you are, RUN to the court. Don’t abuse the court systems, but use it for your own benefit when you are entitled to it.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-hdo_5pEjE

 

GPYB’s Relationship Court: Evidence and Notice


How to avoid a judgment against you for throwing out your ex’s stuff or how to prevail when your ex throws your stuff out. Two words: EVIDENCE and NOTICE!!!

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smWOqIDBuwM

 

GPYB’s Relationship Court: Written and Verbal Contracts


Know your rights and obligations when you co-sign or enter into a written agreement with your partner. Know what happens when you breakup with an apartment lease, a car lease, a cell phone plan. Know your rights (there will not be many).

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vcPFiyvoPc8

 

Build Your Own Life & Stop Worrying About Your Ex


If you’re thinking of the ex and the ex’s new love, that is 3 people not thinking about YOU. Time to change the equation. Get back in your own life! Time to make a list of things you need to do for you. It’s time to stop obsessing on what the ex did or did not do and what the new person has that you don’t. THINK ABOUT YOU.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1_Cpw1gDeQQ

 

Closure & Getting Answers To Questions You Really Don’t Want


We all want “closure” and we also want answers to make our breakup make sense. Be careful what you wish for.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TdcVxPW1htg

 

Getting Past Your Breakup; My Story Part One


I’m putting GPYB and part of GBOT on YouTube for the workshop/seminar/study hall that is beginning 1/1/16 and part of the first book is my story. This is part one.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mrFr88KO0qM

 

Getting Past Your Breakup; My Story Part Two

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u0drrFdGJ88

 

Getting Past Your Breakup; My Story Part Three

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_GplbiUACo

 

Getting Past Your Breakup; My Story Part Four

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6PuQZyEPXaM

 

Getting Past Your Breakup; My Story The Finale: Part Five

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUkQ9ksW3jk

 

Being Friends With The Ex (and why it’s a bad idea!)


Don’t feel guilty if you don’t want to be friends with the person who broke your heart.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bQNpM2fqbVg

 

Loyalty and the Adult Child Dilemma


When to be loyal and when not to be and how growing up in a dysfunctional home does not prepare you to know when to be either. When we insist on being loyal to someone who is mistreating us, we are being EXTREMELY disloyal to ourselves and this tendency is PROMINENT in adult child (of alcoholics, substance abusers, divorced parents etc).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-HiijGasQQ

Standards and Compatibility Part I


You have to think about what are your standards long before you’re ready to date. The memory card ran out in the middle of the video so this is part I. 🙂

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iMf7K5QsWIQ

Standards and Compatibility Part 2


You have to think about what are your standards long before you’re ready to date. This is about developing and sticking to your boundaries, standards, negotiables and non-negotiables.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iN6Tr_3F5TU

GPYB Affirmations Part I


Affirmations Work When Done Correctly! Learn How…part I I’ve updated it in 2016. NOTE: These videos use VERSION I of the workbook. The workbook is now V2. You will be able to find the place but the page numbers may be different. You can buy the workbook at the www.gettingpastyourbreakup.com page.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TUIer1ji8CU

GPYB Affirmations Part II


Affirmations Work When Done Correctly! Learn How…part II.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCY4-PqDdL8

GPYB Affirmations Part III


Affirmations Work When Done Correctly! Learn How…part III.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9yrVvZAgWI

Roadmap to Healing: Grief Goals and Good To Me


How to start the roadmap to healing. Why grief is so hard and what you need to balance it out. You need to understand your grief process, work on self-care and set goals, big and small.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SqhQl6Kb_cU

 

GPYB Does Anybody Miss Me???


It’s better to be alone than to be with people who make you feel alone.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIeOaP-b-HQ

CoParenting with the Personality Disordered and the System


This video accompanies my series on Psychology Today on CoParenting with the Personality Disordered and “the system” and specifically addresses email harangues and Parenting Coordinators who allow inappropriate communication. If you have questions or comments, please leave them below and I will answer them.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mfdoLwmfDpQ

How Can Someone Just Walk Out After Saying They Love You


Answering Questions from the Questions Post Continued. How can someone say they love you in the morning and walk out in the evening?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wxVi6YAOh4

My Ex Has Changed Into Who I Wanted Her To Be


Can people suddenly change into the person you wanted them to be? Don’t be fooled by Facebook and Instagram happy – shiny photos. Don’t believe that someone suddenly becomes the person you want them to be. It doesn’t usually happen. It’s not true. Don’t compare your insides to someone else’s outsides.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8vPdiIiFKHU

GPYB Questions From The ?’s Post: Introducing Kids To New Partner


Questions: This question has to do with a partner who is now parading the

new partner in front of the children PART 1.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-vHTvJKbmU

Getting Past Your Breakup: Moving On From Mr. Confused


Questions from the Questions Post on how to move on from a man who one day says she’s the one he wants to spend his life with and the next is moving on – VERY VERY MIXED MESSAGES.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7p7OjLCPio

Getting Past Your Breakup: Simple Divorce Dragged out


Another Questions from the Questions Post on filing for divorce, 401k, IRS and spousal support. It’s difficult to get spousal support when you’ve lived for a year without it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCBjDmyziAg

The Ex Introduces the Kids To The New GF/BF


Follow up on when the ex brings someone new around the children too early. One of the Questions today was about the ex bringing someone new around the children – this is a more general answer for everyone.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ddgqgiTX38U

GPYB: Staying Silent About Abuse and Being Called a Liar


It’s hard to come out as an abuse victim and too many victims are revictimized after they tell the truth. I’ve been told my book is a lie. I’ve had people give me negative reviews because they think that too much of my story is in the book. It’s not easy to come out and tell your truth when you’ve been a victim. One of the biggest fears is that no one is going to believe you. So to be called a liar is to have one of the biggest fears you’ve had realized and it’s not okay.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hI3APEjdFQY

Introduction to Staying Silent About Abuse


I’m going to be doing some videos on being a victim and being called a liar as well as those who are trying to game the system by claiming to be a victim when they’re not.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXB_OFUoIcQ

Getting Past Your Breakup: When The Perfect Person Walks


Question from the questions post. You can email me at gpyb.com AT gmail.com instead of the blog if you have new questions. When you really care about someone who says you’re the perfect person for them, but they have issues to work through from past relationships and can’t be in the relationship with you right now…what to do? Number one requirement: WANTS TO BE WITH ME!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gn05INkFPrQ

Getting Past Your Breakup: Getting Over Emotional Abuse


Question from the Questions post: when you’ve been with a deranged sociopathic gaslighter. How to move on?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sPnzMKKVBIY

On Widows and Widowers


People tend to not understand widows and widowers who lose the love of their lives. It’s a tough place to be and compassion would help us a lot. There is NO time frame that is “right” and you should never tell someone that it’s time to move on.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vd7dhmJC-1M

Question: Is It Bad To Not Want To Be Alone?


Question from the Questions Post: Is It Bad To Not Want To Be Alone?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LAB3fKpSzPw

Gaslighting and Emotional Abuse and Manipulation


If you think you’re going crazy, it’s probably not you. The many facets of gaslighting…an intense and particularly abusive form of psychological manipulation. The Psychology Today article is here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/getting-back-out-there/201610/10-ways-tell-if-youre-being-gaslighted.

/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVt5SNp59vs

GPYB: Boundary Setting 1


Boundary setting. I’m doing a few different videos on boundary setting and this is 1. They’re not in a series or any particular order but numbering them so that you can remember which one you’ve watched.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=klcvzXDDZ-A

GPYB: Boundary Setting Preface


Boundary setting — getting ready to set some boundaries. If you’re feeling put upon or upset, it’s time to set a boundary without worrying about how other people are going to feel about it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dnQOL2ZDaas

GPYB: Having Kids With a Cheater


As an attorney and a therapist, I sometimes recap judge shows that stay with me. Judges will say, “I’m not a therapist” and therapists will say, “I’m not a lawyer…” Well, I’m both so I have that somewhat unique perspective. I am recapping and commenting on a Judge Mathis episode that I saw where this woman had a child with a guy she called a cheater who had 8 kids…craziness ensued. STOP THESE RIDICULOUS SCENARIOS. It makes for good TV but terrible life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FHtmn-evF84

GPYB: Boundaries and Family Roles (Hero/Scapegoat/Mascot/Lost)


One of the things to think about with boundaries is stepping out the role that you’ve been assigned. it’s time to stop and observe. When you grow up in dysfunctional families, you get assigned a role such as hero, mascot, lost child, scapegoat and you have to step out of that role before you can set boundaries and change your life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ISwRr_pWp88

GPYB: Boundaries and Relationships


Learning to set boundaries with children and adults are often the same thing. Sometimes when you’re setting boundaries, it’s not that cut and dried. Boundaries are very complicated. It takes a lot to work on relationships and boundaries are definitely part of the equation.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4PVSdaG16g

GPYB: Affirmations Part 1


Affirmations are not “new agey and Oprah-eque” which is what one reviewer said they were. They are based on science and IF DONE RIGHT, they work! We’re going to use the GPYP workbook to get some done!!! In 2017, the Affirmations Booklet is also available on its own. I am re-releasing the Workbook in 2017 and will be releasing the most popular chapters by themselves. To get the worksheets and the NEWEST version of the affirmation chapter go to the blog and click on Affirmation Booklet.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iW9HnCZPNM8

GPYB: Affirmations Part 2


Affirmations part 2….listening to your self-talk and spontaneous interruption affirmations.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_ONK7GajH8

GPYB: Affirmations Part 3


Affirmations part 3…proactive affirmations

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rMPHBDC1Kws

GPYB: Affirmations Part 4


Affirmations part 4 self soothing and credit affirmations. If you are doing difficult grief work, you MUST get comfortable with self-soothing affirmations.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxRX9Z1PfPg

GPYB: Affirmations Part 5


Affirmations part 5 encouragement affirmations. Learn to have encouraging affirmations at the ready when you are having a tough day. You have to give yourself credit for the work you are doing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ij6BcEuIc8

GPYB: Boundaries Check List


A checklist to see if you are setting boundaries correctly…the checklist is from the Getting Past Your Past workbook available for instant download on www.GettingPastYourBreakup.com.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNEKpdY48Qc

GPYB: Boundaries and Language


Language is very important when it comes to boundary setting. Using “I” language. Making sure that your language matches the situation and that everyone knows what words mean. How to explain to everyone, adults and children, what you expect from them. How to set reasonable expectations. Picking your battles and learning to communicate expectations.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L2Zlvf-beFE

GPYB: Your Right To Set Boundaries & Affirmations


Another boundary lesson on setting boundaries with children and boundary crashers (Part 1 is about 9 minutes long) and, part 2, how to affirm your right to have boundaries.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvGMhcIx9D8

GPYB: Systematic Training for Effective Parenting Boundaries


I’ve referred to this book a few times in my boundary videos and wanted to give a quick overview of the book for parents and others who need to understand how boundaries make children feel safe and loved. I am not affiliated with this book or these authors in any way – they had an AMAZING effect on my life and they are included in the bibliographies in my books. I talk about how to use this book in almost all my boundary videos and it was an AMAZING resource in my life. Children want and need boundaries….give them to them!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SUncE5Vz_Ko

GPYB: Moving On After Infidelity and Broken Trust


This was a question on the blog about affirmations and becoming honest again after being unfaithful and being with a deceptive person. How do you move on when you feel shame and guilt? How do you trust people if you yourself have lied?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9IL78ncR3yM

Power Affirmations: Change Your Life in 30 Days!


Power Affirmations webinar slide show (before and after discussion not included).  This is a definitive guide to changing your life via affirmations, mantras and self-image. Learn how to write successful affirmations and how to use them every day.  Affirmations are very effective and will change your self-image and building a healthy life.  This slide show demonstrates how to write them the RIGHT way.  If you’ve used affirmations in the past and they haven’t worked, it’s probably because they’re written WRONG. You will learn how to write them correctly and change your life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUfn7PfiIdg

NC The Way to Wellness


NC Webinar – NO CONTACT is the SECRET to wellness. GO NC TODAY!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=clyOMywrfog

Codependency Webinar


Webinar to kick off the codependency bootcamp starting 3/20. This has not been offered for 2 years.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4jdSuxTwuds

AND FOR FUN – me being yanked on stage as I recount in the GBOT book (I wasn’t making it up)

Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes and ME – I Don’t Want To Go Home


This video was taken by Larry Rulz. Please visit his AWESOME YouTube channel for SSJ, Bruce, the whole 9 New Jersey yards. I can’t thank Larry enough for this one. Thank you!!! How I decided to go out one night and wound up on stage with my favorite singer. When I tell my readers GET OUT THERE, you never know what will happen. This is what happened to me.

After 3.5 years of grieving over the loss of the love of my life and 1.5 years of being disabled and unable to go many places too often, I heard that Southside Johnny, whom I have loved and seen so much over 35 years was going to be playing 15 minutes from my house. I heard the commercial on the way home from closing on my house that I shared with Michael, the house where he passed and I was sobbing. If anyone could get me out of the house, it was Southside. And I was going. Alone. I didn’t know if it would make things better or worse for me, but I was going. I wanted to see him and his shows always made me happy and I needed (desperately) to feel happy for once. This was my first night out and I decided to follow my on advice. You have no idea what happens when you do. I left there a very different person and I thank you Southside…I love you.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22iuWgiWfAA